Love, actually
Some random things that have drifted across my mind recently:
~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~
We spend our lives looking for something that will matter so much to us,
that we can’t live without it
Then when we find it,
we run away to practise living without it.
~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~
Do you ever have a moment when you realise that someone genuinely cares for you
And you wonder, “WHY?”
Being loved is almost as moving an experience as loving someone
Sometimes it’s slightly spooky and occasionally downright scary
…coming face to face with those aspects of yourself that are deserving of love.
~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~
Each time you hurt me
I flee and hide
Nursing my wounds and wondering why you keep hurting meAnd then I come back to you
In the hope that this time, you’ll heal me instead.
~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~
You don’t need to own a person to be able to love them
You don’t need to be in a relationship with them, don’t need to have them reciprocate
You don’t even actually need them to be actively a part of your life
All you need is to be happy that the person exists
Not indifferent, not indulgent but actively pleased, gratified by the thought
If the thought of the person puts a smile on your face, that can erase all the unpleasant memories they’ve created…
That’s love, that’s love enough, that’s enough really.
~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~
Earlier in the week, I inadvertently said something funny and intelligent (only I can’t remember it now). And someone in the room said,
Will you marry me?
I dimpled when someone told my proposer,
You’re already married….to a great man!!!!!
~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~
On the weekend, I saw my dear friend. And she looked mesmerizing. She was always a pretty girl. Nicely-dressed too. But last evening, she was positively shimmering. Suddenly I just knew that she was very beautiful. Like her very skin was aglow with her deeply spiritual self, her eyes dancing with the sweet, uncynical wisdom I’ve come to associate with her. Didn’t someone say “We don’t love people because they’re beautiful but they seem beautiful to us because we love them.”? Then when I told her for the fifteenth time that she looked gorgeous, she beamed back and eyes twinkling, asked,
Are you having a crush on me?
I declared,
YES!
And again, for a brief moment, I wondered why my normally easy-to-agitation self was so complacent, unperturbed over something that seems to disturb most people.
~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~
From a movie I saw on the weekend,
You can have both roots and wings.
~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~
If you enjoyed this post, make sure you subscribe to my RSS feed!Sometimes truly loving a person means letting them believe that they care about you more than you care about them. Everybody needs to be loved but some people can’t bear to be reminded of it.
anand jeyahar on 
IdeaSmith on 
1ricercer
wrote on 13 May 2007 at 14:49
thanks for writing this
its beauticul perfect v wise and v happy reading 
2DC
wrote on 13 May 2007 at 18:17
This is nice, contemplative but not preachy, pithy and quotable
3Bibs
wrote on 13 May 2007 at 22:15
…beautiful thoughts….its scary how articulate you are on some of these …
4Shreyasi
wrote on 14 May 2007 at 9:24
Unadulterated Ideasmithy! loved this one
5chronicus skepticus
wrote on 14 May 2007 at 11:58
Y’know the weirdest thing? I can’t remember what you said either! However, my offer still stands (yes, despite the ‘great man’).
Stupid monogamy!
*grin*
6ideasmith
wrote on 14 May 2007 at 14:08
@ Ricercer, DC, Bibs:
Thenk yew vairy much!
@ Shreyasi: LOL….aajkal sab cheezon mein milawat hai, sivay Ideasmithy ke! *Pardon my brief moment of madness*
@ Chronicus Skepticus: Mucho gratified! Wonly, this comment blows the cover off my ‘mysterious proposer’.
7manuscrypts
wrote on 14 May 2007 at 16:11
hmmm..wondering about the movie line..
8{illyria}
wrote on 14 May 2007 at 17:24
lovely vignettes!
9someonearbit
wrote on 14 May 2007 at 19:35
lol…. true….
I dont believe I need to be loved…
and then sometimes I just look at myself in the eye in the mirror and smile “What bullshit!”
then walk out of the house..and say…bloody sentimental jellyfish you are becoming woman! knock some sense into that head.
lol..
10Ginger Girl
wrote on 14 May 2007 at 19:36
lol…. true….
I dont believe I need to be loved…
and then sometimes I just look at myself in the eye in the mirror and smile “What bullshit!”
then walk out of the house..and say…bloody sentimental jellyfish you are becoming woman! knock some sense into that head.
lol..
11Masquerader
wrote on 14 May 2007 at 20:23
Uh, one more proposal wouldn’t be totally inappropriate, would it? But I have to ask. Will you marry me?
12Because of B
wrote on 14 May 2007 at 21:16
u know wot
perfect time to put the perfect thots…
13Brad
wrote on 15 May 2007 at 0:25
The last one puts a few things into the right perspective and helps me understand Toujours better!
14Melody
wrote on 15 May 2007 at 1:11
“Didn’t someone say “We don’t love people because they’re beautiful but they seem beautiful to us because we love them.”?”
I think I learned this is as part of an English Lesson in my school’s “Bal Bharati”… what was it now? Ah yes, it was this Russian Folk take – My mother is the most beautiful woman in the world.
http://www.amazon.com/Mother-Most-Beautiful-Woman-World/dp/0688512518
You’d like
15St
wrote on 15 May 2007 at 12:52
> You can have both roots and wings.
Chicken curry?
16Brad
wrote on 15 May 2007 at 21:05
I remember the story that Melody makes a mention of in here. 7th standard, I think. After reading that story, I also remember telling my friend – “I don’t think my mom is the most beautiful woman in the world. But I don’t think I love her any less.” I went on to say that the lesson was a wee bit misleading.
It’s funny that I still remember those lines.
17J. Alfred Prufrock
wrote on 16 May 2007 at 7:31
Too deep for me, ma’m. I should stick to samosettes. And grape juice.
(You, your ‘proposer’ and the other small lady owe two men an Evening with an Amnesty.)
Your template’s jumping. Very … disorienting? … for an old man.
J.A.P.
18ideasmith
wrote on 16 May 2007 at 14:30
@ Manuscrypts: ‘Sweet Home Alabama’.
@ Masquerader:
Thank you. I’m really enjoying my freedom right now. I’ll treasure the comment for posterity, though.
@ Because of B: Is it? Has it happened to you too?
@ Brad: Ah, so she does exist? When are you going to tell us about her?
@ Melody: That’s the story I was remembering. Didn’t want to write it all out in this post, though.
@ St: :-p I ddin’t know the critters had roots too!
@ J.A.P. – Old man? Teddy-bear! Sorry about the template….it reflects my mood – jumpy and restless till…uh, well, till I settle down.
19St
wrote on 17 May 2007 at 10:37
potatos are ‘roots’
20Pack of atoms
wrote on 18 May 2007 at 17:13
Uncanny…are you by any chance a member of the Thought Police?
[a first time commenter n regular reader]
21ideasmith
wrote on 19 May 2007 at 11:18
@ St:
@ Pack of atoms: Ah, now that you know, I’ll have to kill you.
Thanks for speaking up….it is always good to actually talk to people who read you.
22Pack of atoms
wrote on 26 May 2007 at 2:17
Or, (since you’re no stranger to proposals from women:P) you could marry me?
23ideasmith
wrote on 26 May 2007 at 19:32
@ Pack of atoms: If some people I’ve dated are to believed….marriage might be an even more fitting punishment than murder!
24Pack of atoms
wrote on 3 June 2007 at 20:40
*shudder*
methinx we must’ve dated d same people
[v late, pliss miss, sorry miss!]
25ideasmith
wrote on 4 June 2007 at 10:19
@ Pack of atoms: Hmm…I wonder if we’ve ever dated each other!